Wednesday, January 28, 2009

OH NO...

I skipped school AGAIN today. Kill me please. I didn't do ANY homework at ALL.

Not even one . I think I've to buck up soon 'cause I practically skipped 3 art lessons, 2 physics,2 chem and one english lessons. I don't know HOW I'm going to catch up. Really,man. ):

I didn't want to skip school today, I had no choice. Okay maybe I did but I didn't want to get scolded for not doing my homework!! I think I'm going to commit suicide.

Whatever, I think I'm going to fail this year and retain for 25 years. HAHA/. Shit I hope it doesn't really happen. I need to study & talk to God ! What's wrong with me, argh . My head's filled with questions asking myself why didn't I do my homework. Oh I'm turning into a nerd. But I want to have a good future. How to when I didn't even do my homeworks, Then I'll have to go take mc and waste money. Then I'll miss lessons & It'll be hard for me to catch up. Oh God I know you're there. Save me from this jumbled up mess. Save me, my soul forever from the clutches of the world. Let me free. Free me with your grace, your mercy your love. I know I know you know. That's why I'm praying to you, that's why I'm talking to you. I love you less than you love me. might be less than my love for the world. satan is helping me! Don't let him help me oh please . I might fall way deep down into darkness. I need you, God.

I don't need any guy on the street, I don't need boyfriends, when all they give you is hurt, tears, emotions running wild. I know there's nice guys out there, but they're hiding away from my world, I want to have a boyfriend, but I know I'm Ashley. I'm the Ashley no one wants, No one can get (: I'm not depressed don't worry. It's not a depressing CNY for me. It's just that...

I'm such a bitch lately, why oh why. I didn't do my homework,I kept staying over at places,I kept being an ass. I kept delaying my time with God. I...

I think you like me, But you're not good-looking, but you're not the type of guy I like, you're not everything I like. Yes You're nice & all. But sorry I'm an ass. I just don't like you. I just love you being my friend.I feel awkward being together with you. Please don't try to touch me, I'm sensitive, I'm just your friend. & I'm superficial. Always superficial & I'm a whiny bitch.

This is a wordy post I'll update again with pictures & whatever that happened on CNY.

Oh well, Happy Chinese New Year all.

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